The Book Wench

Somewhere out beyond the edge of the universe there is a library that contains an infinite number of books, each one the story of another reality. One tells the story of your life as it is, along with another book for the other life you could have lived if you had made a different choice at any point in your life. While we all wonder how our lives might have been, what if you had the chance to go to the library and see for yourself? Would any of these other lives truly be better?

In The Midnight Library, Matt Haig’s enchanting blockbuster novel, Nora Seed finds herself faced with this decision. Faced with the possibility of changing her life for a new one, following a different career, undoing old breakups, realizing her dreams of becoming a glaciologist; she must search within herself as she travels through the Midnight Library to decide what is truly fulfilling in life, and what makes it worth living in the first place.

This book was incredible. I have dealt with disappointment, bad luck, and severe depression for a majority of my life so I was able to empathize immediately with Nora. As I have mentioned previously, I have recently, for the last two years, been dealing with severe health issues. These health issues have, to this point, irrevocably changed certain aspects of my life. I have had numerous procedures, a surgery, and nineteen separate hospital stays. I will never again be able to eat most foods because of the danger high levels of fat can pose to my pancreas, and almost everything has fat in it. I have been desolate at the idea that I will never be able to get my PhD or teach because both of those things are hard, nearly impossible, to do with a chronic, chaotic condition. Even working a regular job feels impossible because I’m not able to lift heavy things or do a lot to engage my abdomen for fear of triggering a pancreatitis flare again (I have done it twice now). I have felt that, aside from finishing my Masters as something to work toward, my life is essentially over.

This book has changed that. I no longer feel like my life is over. I emailed my professor the moment I finished the book to thank her for assigning it as our final book of the semester. I wanted her to know how profoundly the book has changed my point of view about everything going on in my life.

This book was profoundly needed for me at this exact moment. I feel like it was written expressly and intentionally for me to read it at this very point of my life. I even started it on Tuesday, April 28th, the same day the book restarts over and over. (That was a weird realization, along with the fact that I am also 35, as Nora is). This book made me realize that while I may never be able to eat the things I want to, I still can try for my PhD. Barring that, I can teach with a Masters, although it may not be the higher-level classes like I want to teach. My life isn’t over simply because I’ve hit a health snag. I have been so fearful of death (and life) for a couple of years now, dealing with all of this. But I am at a place right now where I feel okay. I haven’t been hospitalized since early March, so I’m on a good stretch. This book helped me realize that my life isn’t over simply because it’s been hard. I still have a lot of things that I can do. And I am never out of options until that line runs flat and stays flat. And It’s going to take a lot to get me to that point and now I have even more of a reason to fight against it. 

Okay, now the emotional bits aside, this book was so beautifully written. It was perfectly paced and I loved Nora. I was unsure of how I would feel about her and the book when I first started it, but within just a couple of chapters, it had me in tears with empathy. It really gave me a new perspective, and I LOVE when books can affect me so deeply as that.

I sincerely think that everyone should read this book at some point in their life, even if they aren’t struggling like I or Nora. We all hit snags or low points eventually; we all have moments of regret. And I think this book is the perfect remedy to that.

Please, go read it.